Kids (except newborns through 4 weeks).
Getting paper stuck in my printer.
My local pharmacy.
Friends of Kids.
Public School Systems.
Crimes I can't solve (this one is for Aede Mig).
Court trials that don't go the way I want.
People that take days to text you back.
That I can't talk or text Joy because of the exorbitant international fees.
People who stare when I go to to Walmart in my pajama's.
Parents who demand their child has to be home to have dinner with them every night even if they have already eaten at your house.
Dusting and Vacumming.
Dr.'s who won't listen to you and just talk over what your trying to tell them.
That both forearms look like they were used for possum bait due to playing with my dogs.
That the little cloth they give you at the eye doctor to clean your glasses and protect the glare coating never cleans your glasses.
People who put you on hold to take another call, if I take the time to call you then why do I want to sit there while you rudely talk to someone else? Let them call back.
Loud noises (this includes children because I haven't seen a quiet one yet).
When my dog farts and then turns and looks at me in disgust like I did it. I personally would know if something came from my own arse.
Cars with loud music that "beats"
Having IBS, it's always a guessing game and sometimes you lose.
My next door neighbor who thinks he can play the piano, he can but only one song, over and over again(Wasn't that a Tim McGraw and Nelly collaboration?).
Trying to poke a tiny Phenobarbital pill down a 4lb Chihuahua throat, feeling the victory of having accomplished the feat and then later finding them all over the house where he has outwitted me. Food? Forget that he learned to pick around the food until he finds them years ago.
Child Beauty Pageants (Didn't I just mention this one in a post?)
Having three boys who know you suffer from memory loss because of Lupus. How can I argue my case when I can't be sure there was a case in the first place? Why do I never forget professional knowledge, only kid knowledge? They may be playing me and I don't have memory loss at all.
Jose Baez and his protege Casey Anthony, oh and let's throw in Casey's lying Mom Cindy here too. I wouldn't feel complete if I didn't.
Early morning phone calls, this would irritate me even more if I left my phone on so they actually got through.
Now that I think about it early morning anything irritates me. I would be a great vampire.
Being a medium, I don't mind seeing the past or spirit but I hate seeing the future.
People who call me for a phone reading. I don't know how many different ways I can say "I don't do them" before people understand it.
Somebody, they all blame each other, that drinks the last Coke at night. I have to start my day with a Coke or withdrawal sets in and I'm a bitch until I get one. I'm going to catch one of them in the act some night and have one less child.
Waiting on my new gel and memory foam with the heat massage recliners to get here. Leave it to me to not like the color of the one in the store and special order. I tried to get a rush put on it but they just wouldn't buy the old "I will be so much more comfortable watching my reality shows" as an excuse. Bet if I had said sports it would have been a different story.
Waking up to find the cross that hangs on my wall upside down. I know one of these monster children has done it to watch me freak out I just don't know which one for sure. I suspect River but what if I jump him for it and then it turns out it was Creek or Lake?
More to come....